Sunday, August 29, 2010
Back to School Shoes
Friday, August 27, 2010
10 Misconceptions about Moms and School
First off - I didn't write this - I wish I had! Whoever did write this however, might be my long lost soul sister. I hate clear contact paper and back to school nights with a passion. This is definitely funny and I borrowed it from a friend on facebook. xo, Brie
Misconception Number 1: Moms miss their kids when they go back to school
Seriously. I've had enough of you by now. Every morning with the "what are we going to do today, Mom?" is finally over. I've had looked at your face twenty-four seven for the last 77 days. It's time to go learn something. No more asking me about the pool, when is the next snack or if you can stay up late and watch a movie. It's over..You're going back to Hogwarts and I get to have a life again. There is a Christmas morning for parents and it's called "back to school".
Misconception Number 2: Moms like to go school shopping.
Are you freaking kidding me? Why do I pay taxes?.so I can rack up a 200dollar bill at Staples for crap that we have laying around my house in junk drawers. Why does it have to be new pencils? What's wrong with the chewed up, broken strawberry shortcake pencils sitting in the bottom of the toy box for the last 6 months? And how many subject books can you possibly need?What happened to reading, writing and arithmetic. If they added a couple of things for parents to that list I wouldn't mind so much..why not pencils,erasers and vodka ...or some Nyquil.
Misconception Number 3: Moms like back to school night.
Why must we do this every year? I got it already. You're the teacher. I’m the parent. My kid is either going to be smart or dumb. If he gets a certain number or colored dot on his discipline chart, he can't get a prize from the prize box. Pretty simple stuff. Listen, I'm pretty old school. If he doesn't listen to you. you can throw something at him. I don't care. But I got a lot of work to do at home and I'm paying a babysitter right now. Plus, I'm pretty sure you are going to assign some project on wigwams made by some Indian tribe I've never heard of, so I need to get home and start my research. So, I got it. We're all here for the betterment of the kids. Blah Blah Blah. Can I leave now?
Misconception Number 4: Moms like school paperwork.
How many trees are you planning on killing to tell me the same stuff I had to pay a babysitter to listen to the other night? You know our name, where we live and our emergency phone numbers. He doesn't have a nickname..call him "stinkbutt" for all I care. We don't have any "special circumstances"that you need to know about. He lives in a home with two parents who may or may not like each other at any given time and they will fight. If that qualifies as a reason he can't get his homework done on time then he won't be able to function as an adult and have a real job so you may want to"educate" him on that life lesson.
Misconception Number 5: Moms like covering books in that annoying sticky paper.
What exactly will you be doing with these books that I have to cover them in a plastic laminate? Do you often teach in the rain? Or while the children are drinking soda and eating soup? Do you know how long that takes? Has any parent in the history of education been able to do it without any air bubbles in it? From now on I'm covering it the old way. brown paper bags.That way I can cover the books and pack their lunches at that same time. Who says moms can't multitask?
PS. Please tell my son if he can't find his lunch to look in his science book.
Misconception Number 6: Moms like helping you with your homework.
What? I am scared out of my mind. I'm pretty sure that I forgot everything I learned in fifth grade by the time I was in sixth grade. I have no idea what you are talking about most days. I don't really know my 12 times tables, I read the cliff notes to all your summer reading and I don't know how to conjugate anything but I do know that song "conjunction junction what's your function" if that helps at all. And please don't even say the words "new math" to me. What the heck was wrong the old one?
Misconception Number 7: Moms can't wait to pack your lunch every day until we die.
I hate doing laundry. Making dinner every night is the bane of my existence,so making your lunch every day for an entire year, in terms of "mom fun",lies somewhere between brushing plaque off the dogs teeth and scheduling my annual pap smear. Listen, as a child I hated what my mom packed me for lunch. But, like every kid before me, and every generation to come you will find a kid to trade with. I’m sure someone likes sardines.
Misconception Number 8: Moms love after school activities.
I don't know who made up this idea of organized clubs and sports but they should be the ones in charge of carting your ass around. Don't get me wrong.I'm not against all after school programs. I just wish they would offer it during hours that would work best for me so that dinner wasn't at 8:30 at night followed by 4 hours of homework. Why not do it on the weekends and call it "after-hours activities" so mommy and daddy could actually go out one night and pretend that we have a life of our own. Don't worry about us though I'm sure that me and "what's his name" will be married a very longtime.
Misconception Number 9: Moms don't mind taking you to school if you miss the bus
Your bus comes at 7:10 am..which means that you should be standing by the door at 7:05 am. Not eating breakfast , chasing the dog around the house or in the bathroom, asking me to check your homework while I'm taking a shower.Get it together! I don't like running down the street in my jammies at 7:12screaming "Please wait" or "If you stop I'll show you my boobies."
Misconception Number 10: Moms cry on your first day of school
We do cry but they are tears of joy. I have done my job. I have successfully kept a human child alive for at least 5 years without doing any major damage. Motherhood is the hardest job in the world!! Sure, doctors savel ives and CEO's run million dollar businesses but. You teach a kid not to poop their pants and then you can say you've made the world a better place."
Seriously. I've had enough of you by now. Every morning with the "what are we going to do today, Mom?" is finally over. I've had looked at your face twenty-four seven for the last 77 days. It's time to go learn something. No more asking me about the pool, when is the next snack or if you can stay up late and watch a movie. It's over..You're going back to Hogwarts and I get to have a life again. There is a Christmas morning for parents and it's called "back to school".
Misconception Number 2: Moms like to go school shopping.
Are you freaking kidding me? Why do I pay taxes?.so I can rack up a 200dollar bill at Staples for crap that we have laying around my house in junk drawers. Why does it have to be new pencils? What's wrong with the chewed up, broken strawberry shortcake pencils sitting in the bottom of the toy box for the last 6 months? And how many subject books can you possibly need?What happened to reading, writing and arithmetic. If they added a couple of things for parents to that list I wouldn't mind so much..why not pencils,erasers and vodka ...or some Nyquil.
Misconception Number 3: Moms like back to school night.
Why must we do this every year? I got it already. You're the teacher. I’m the parent. My kid is either going to be smart or dumb. If he gets a certain number or colored dot on his discipline chart, he can't get a prize from the prize box. Pretty simple stuff. Listen, I'm pretty old school. If he doesn't listen to you. you can throw something at him. I don't care. But I got a lot of work to do at home and I'm paying a babysitter right now. Plus, I'm pretty sure you are going to assign some project on wigwams made by some Indian tribe I've never heard of, so I need to get home and start my research. So, I got it. We're all here for the betterment of the kids. Blah Blah Blah. Can I leave now?
Misconception Number 4: Moms like school paperwork.
How many trees are you planning on killing to tell me the same stuff I had to pay a babysitter to listen to the other night? You know our name, where we live and our emergency phone numbers. He doesn't have a nickname..call him "stinkbutt" for all I care. We don't have any "special circumstances"that you need to know about. He lives in a home with two parents who may or may not like each other at any given time and they will fight. If that qualifies as a reason he can't get his homework done on time then he won't be able to function as an adult and have a real job so you may want to"educate" him on that life lesson.
Misconception Number 5: Moms like covering books in that annoying sticky paper.
What exactly will you be doing with these books that I have to cover them in a plastic laminate? Do you often teach in the rain? Or while the children are drinking soda and eating soup? Do you know how long that takes? Has any parent in the history of education been able to do it without any air bubbles in it? From now on I'm covering it the old way. brown paper bags.That way I can cover the books and pack their lunches at that same time. Who says moms can't multitask?
PS. Please tell my son if he can't find his lunch to look in his science book.
Misconception Number 6: Moms like helping you with your homework.
What? I am scared out of my mind. I'm pretty sure that I forgot everything I learned in fifth grade by the time I was in sixth grade. I have no idea what you are talking about most days. I don't really know my 12 times tables, I read the cliff notes to all your summer reading and I don't know how to conjugate anything but I do know that song "conjunction junction what's your function" if that helps at all. And please don't even say the words "new math" to me. What the heck was wrong the old one?
Misconception Number 7: Moms can't wait to pack your lunch every day until we die.
I hate doing laundry. Making dinner every night is the bane of my existence,so making your lunch every day for an entire year, in terms of "mom fun",lies somewhere between brushing plaque off the dogs teeth and scheduling my annual pap smear. Listen, as a child I hated what my mom packed me for lunch. But, like every kid before me, and every generation to come you will find a kid to trade with. I’m sure someone likes sardines.
Misconception Number 8: Moms love after school activities.
I don't know who made up this idea of organized clubs and sports but they should be the ones in charge of carting your ass around. Don't get me wrong.I'm not against all after school programs. I just wish they would offer it during hours that would work best for me so that dinner wasn't at 8:30 at night followed by 4 hours of homework. Why not do it on the weekends and call it "after-hours activities" so mommy and daddy could actually go out one night and pretend that we have a life of our own. Don't worry about us though I'm sure that me and "what's his name" will be married a very longtime.
Misconception Number 9: Moms don't mind taking you to school if you miss the bus
Your bus comes at 7:10 am..which means that you should be standing by the door at 7:05 am. Not eating breakfast , chasing the dog around the house or in the bathroom, asking me to check your homework while I'm taking a shower.Get it together! I don't like running down the street in my jammies at 7:12screaming "Please wait" or "If you stop I'll show you my boobies."
Misconception Number 10: Moms cry on your first day of school
We do cry but they are tears of joy. I have done my job. I have successfully kept a human child alive for at least 5 years without doing any major damage. Motherhood is the hardest job in the world!! Sure, doctors savel ives and CEO's run million dollar businesses but. You teach a kid not to poop their pants and then you can say you've made the world a better place."
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Menu Monday
It's that time of year again - after a wonderful summer, I need to create a schedule here!
(Peperonata pasta from Real Simple Magazine - August 2010 issue)
Tuesday - lemon chicken, rice, peas
Wednesday london broil on the grill, salad
Friday crab cakes
Saturday pasta pepernota from Real Simple magazine this month
(Peperonata pasta from Real Simple Magazine - August 2010 issue)Monday - spaghetti and meatballs, salad, bread
Tuesday - lemon chicken, rice, peas
Wednesday london broil on the grill, salad
Thursday Ravioli, bread and salad
Friday crab cakes
Saturday pasta pepernota from Real Simple magazine this month
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Mermaid Love
I've dropped numerous hints and I am really hoping someone in my family will get me this vase for my birthday! Isn't she awesome?
I'm loving lots of things on this website especially in the ceramics - the lotus candle votives are beautiful too!
I'm loving lots of things on this website especially in the ceramics - the lotus candle votives are beautiful too!
I have no idea where I will put her, but I will make room for her :) xo, Brie
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Free Gardening Consultations
We all know everyone can't have a green thumb. After being away for the summer, I think we can all agree that my pots and window boxes look simply fantastic!
Mr. KB tended to their every need. Exhibit A - check out these planters on my front steps
Exhibit B - I am the envy of all the neighbors with these window box arrangements!
Finally, the piece de la resistance - I give you another thriving pot (also on my front step).
In fairness, to Mr. KB it was a HOT HOT HOT summer, and there were only pansies in these pots which never would have made it. Truth be told, even something heartier would have failed b/c Mr. KB is lacking the old green thumb, so I gave up on this endeavor years ago. I'll be spending part of my day today cleaning these out because I do believe this might be a case of nothing is best :)
Counting down the days til the mums are here ;) xo, Brie
Keeks and Brie in the News
Our cousin Ella's picture was in the newspaper on a piece about the first day of school in Kentucky - sporting a Keeks and Brie braided headband! What a stylish young lady :) xo, Brie
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
5 Things (I'm loving this summer)
Here are my current top 5 things I am loving this summer!
1. Special K Berry Cereal
Really good and only 120 cals per cup (not including the milk) I am a FAN!
2. Real Simple Magazine
One of the only magazines that I save and read cover to cover. It's got it all - book reviews, recipes, cleaning tips, make up reviews... I really need to pony up and purchase a subscription on this.
3. Shadow Blast Eyeshadow by Cover Girl
I don't wear eyeshadow all that often but when I do I am not so good at the application. This handy dandy stick makes life much easier for me. Just rub in the fat stick all over your eyelid and fill in the crease with the pointier dark stick and blend with your finger. You can also add more of the pointy beneath your lash line, but let's not go too nuts here. I told you, I'm no good at this! The only drawback is it definitely creases if you do not apply primer first. I highly recommend this primer potion by Urban Decay - completely worth the 18 dollar investment and it will last you a nice long while.
4. Just Dance on Wii
This is a really fun dancing game for the Wii. It's fun for a little workout (you will not believe how tired you are from doing a few full songs) and also fun to drink wine and have dance offs with your cousins. Just make sure one of your cousins doesn't have a flip video camera to avoid future embarrassing facebook uploads that will surely send you into an untagging frenzy! Rumor has it Just Dance 2 is coming out soon. I'm all over that!
5. Proper Work Out Attire
I used to think these things were silly and a waste. Not so! LOVING these Under Armour shorts for walking (currently on sale for 20 dollars at Sports Authority)
and Costco is selling a 2 pack of sports bras for 24 dollars right now. I have them and they are great! Very supportive and comfortable and bonus points for enough stretch that I don't have to dislocate my shoulder to remove!
My faves coming soon ;) xo, Brie
1. Special K Berry Cereal
Really good and only 120 cals per cup (not including the milk) I am a FAN!
2. Real Simple Magazine
One of the only magazines that I save and read cover to cover. It's got it all - book reviews, recipes, cleaning tips, make up reviews... I really need to pony up and purchase a subscription on this.
3. Shadow Blast Eyeshadow by Cover Girl
I don't wear eyeshadow all that often but when I do I am not so good at the application. This handy dandy stick makes life much easier for me. Just rub in the fat stick all over your eyelid and fill in the crease with the pointier dark stick and blend with your finger. You can also add more of the pointy beneath your lash line, but let's not go too nuts here. I told you, I'm no good at this! The only drawback is it definitely creases if you do not apply primer first. I highly recommend this primer potion by Urban Decay - completely worth the 18 dollar investment and it will last you a nice long while.
4. Just Dance on Wii
This is a really fun dancing game for the Wii. It's fun for a little workout (you will not believe how tired you are from doing a few full songs) and also fun to drink wine and have dance offs with your cousins. Just make sure one of your cousins doesn't have a flip video camera to avoid future embarrassing facebook uploads that will surely send you into an untagging frenzy! Rumor has it Just Dance 2 is coming out soon. I'm all over that!
5. Proper Work Out Attire
I used to think these things were silly and a waste. Not so! LOVING these Under Armour shorts for walking (currently on sale for 20 dollars at Sports Authority)
and Costco is selling a 2 pack of sports bras for 24 dollars right now. I have them and they are great! Very supportive and comfortable and bonus points for enough stretch that I don't have to dislocate my shoulder to remove!
My faves coming soon ;) xo, Brie
Monday, August 16, 2010
itunes dl
I think I've heard this song close to 1 "millino" times this summer (Ladybugs - that one's for you :) but I LOVE it and never tire of it - great for the workout shuffle! xo, Brie
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Back!!!
I hate to be such a no show over the summer months but my computer access is limited but we have been having a lot fun. Definitely another great summer! Hope yours was as well! My to do list includes about a million loads of laundry, a thousand photo downloads to go through, and I haven't even begun to think about digging out those lists with all the required school supplies..... (fingers crossed they are where I think I left them)!
So bear with me, I have lots of funny pics and posts to share. In the meantime, if you are looking for a great face painter for a party - hit me with an email! As you can see, this child (my sweet god daughter) is CLEARLY having the time of her life at this party :) xo, Brie
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